


As Long as You're Mine.

by GaiaMax



Series: He is half my soul, as the poets say [1]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Eddie Diaz, Bisexual Evan "Buck" Buckley, Engagement, Feelings, Fluff, M/M, Public Display of Affection, Soft Eddie Diaz, Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley, i wanted to die at page 10, i wrote this instead of existing in society, it's like 30 pages, just dads being dads, soft boys being soft boys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:34:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22605559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GaiaMax/pseuds/GaiaMax
Summary: Then he knew what he needed to do, it was simple. He wanted, no needed to be more than just Eddie’s boyfriend.But he needed to make Buck officially his. All his.
Relationships: Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Series: He is half my soul, as the poets say [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1626583
Comments: 2
Kudos: 68





	As Long as You're Mine.

**Author's Note:**

> Started making it, had a breakdown, bon appetit.

**_Will you take my hand?/ As Long as You’re Mine._ **

* * *

**In love, one and one are one**

-Jean-Paul Sartre

The shift had lasted longer than twenty-four hours, apparently, some bourgeois-landlord had thought it was okay to build an apartment complex on the cheap. This complex had set on fire and rained debris on all of the one one eight, covering them in bruises. By the time Eddie and Buck had got home, it was twelve am and they were dead on their feet. As quiet as possible, knowing Christopher was asleep and Abuela who had taken over from Carla because they hadn’t gotten home on time, they started to shuffle their way through the front door. 

Wearily, disturbed by the small noise the unlocking of the door created, Abuela woke from her light sleep on the couch, the only reason she was there and not in the guest room was that something or someone was telling her that the boys needed her which meant that she had been up all night praying. That calling allowed her to witness the rest of her boys walk through the door. They were covered in ash and grime, she could tell they hadn’t showered at work because they wanted, no needed to get home as quickly as possible. The grandmother having had years of experience of parenting, was able to tell by the way held on to each other and walked towards the centre of the living room, that they needed to be looked after, so they could look after each other and Christopher. Before either of the two young firefighters could say anything, she was able to speak first having the advantage of a small rest on her side. “Go shower, then come eat and go to bed” she ordered, at her voice both Buck and Eddie looked ready to challenge her order. With an eyebrow raised, daring them to continue she warned them “Compórtate.” The couple knew better than to go against Abuela, having been on the receiving end of that threat- which had grown even more in quantity since they got together. So having been told and forced to listen, they made their way to the shower together. Together.

Slowly, making their way hand in hand, they reach the bathroom. Unable to let go of each other, they awkwardly made their way around the bathroom, bumping into things. Once, Eddie had turned on the shower the room was filled with hot steam. Turning to face each other and still not letting go, both Buck and Eddie weren’t sure where the other began and they ended. Still opposite each other, hands reached out and began undressing each, fingers undoing buttons grazing skin, small tugs at zips giving a strange comfort. While waiting for the shower to get the temperature, the lovers were pressed together in an intimate embrace as though from each other’s touch they would be reborn, a newfound innocence that was only stored in the skin of the subject of affection.

As one they made their way into the cascade of water, they moved in sync as one being. Once the hot water touched the skin, the tension that love couldn’t push away melted from their shoulders. 

Still, face to face, it was Buck who moved first, head bowed down looking at Eddie, arms outstretched reaching towards the others head. “You’ve got stuff in your hair” Buck whispered while sending Eddie under the stream of the shower. Gently, Buck started to finger Eddie’s wet hair, trying to get the bigger pieces of debris out of it. Carrying on with a softness and the heat making this intimacy an act of bonding, only for the high intensity to be rudely interrupted by the shampoo bottle making a farting sound as Buck squeezed the liquid on to his hand in preparation for putting it on Eddie’s dirty hair. Even though it should have ruined the moment, it didn’t, the sounds of soft laughter were hidden under the thunder of water. The haze of the shower created a world where the worries of the world faded away.

It was a little while later, that the couple made their way to the kitchen, both wide awake and half-sleep. On the counter, was two plates of Chilaquiles that Abuela had made for the two before she disappeared into the guest room. After picking up their meals, as best as they could they made their way silently to the couch and sat pressed against each, their need for the other insatiable. Hungrily, Buck wolfed it down leaving Eddie staring at him with judgement. 

“I can’t believe that I’m still attracted to you, right now.” He jested when Buck began to get food around his mouth because of his need to get the food into his body as quick as possible. “Slow down, or you’ll wake up in the middle of the night with a stomach ache and won’t let me go back to sleep.”

“When have I ever done that?” Buck asked matching Eddie’s playful tone while chewing with his mouth open. After he finished chewing that bite, like so many times before, Eddie reached out and wiped Buck’s mouth, he then pulled back and looked at him for a moment and planted a kiss on the corner of his lips before beginning to eat his own food. Buck returned that act of affection with a big smile directed towards Eddie.

“Ah, let’s see Wednesday, last week Friday and Monday” Eddie countered back, one he had finished chewing the food in his food, he too ate like an animal but managed to do it with a finesse that Buck seemed to lack. Unlike Buck, Eddie was able to eat and have a conversation which meant that he finished his food first and then put the empty plate on the coffee table in front of them.

“Don’t act like you don’t love looking after me” The teasing tone Buck spoke in laced with lust.

“Yeah, yeah.” Eddie conceded to Buck’s statement. “Hurry up and finish eating, so we can get to bed” Eddie suggested, no told Buck. The act made Buck swallow the rest of his food in one gulp, which made Eddie regard Buck and question why he was in love with this cartoon character.

“Ohhhh... You just wanna get me in bed” Buck waggled his eyebrows while moving closer to Eddie by almost sitting on his lap. “You could of just said, I would of skipped the whole eating thing.” He spoke in between pressing kisses on the underside of Eddie’s jaw.

“We haven’t eaten since before we left for the fire, so we couldn’t skip it. Also, I’m not having sex with you when Abeula is definitely still awake and you’re tired, I’ve made that mistake before” Eddie lectured, letting Buck continue kissing him but stopping his hands before they could make their journey to Eddie southern hemisphere.

“I can’t believe you’re still annoyed about that I was exhausted, I even said you could finish” Buck now with his head resting on Eddie’s shoulder so they could look each other in the eye, spoke in an exasperated teasing tone, as he did when they had this… _this conversation._

“I didn’t want to have sex with a sleeping person. Is sex with me really that boring?” Eddie spoke, not really sure if he was still joking.

“You know that’s some people’s kink. I fell asleep because sex with you is really that good.” Buck spoke trying to placate his lover while lacing their hands together, Eddie’s eyes roaming over Buck’s face asking to explain further. “I was tired and I felt safe and loved, we weren’t just having sex. We were making love. It was good and soft, I felt comfortable and great, like my whole body was tingling, that's why I fell asleep. Anyway, I don’t know what you expected, you know sex makes me sleepy, idiot.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry for getting annoyed. Thanks for stroking my ego”

“I can stroke something else if you want”

“No. Com’ on, we’ll go to bed to sleep” Eddie stood up pulling up Buck with him and leading him to the bedroom.

Once in the bedroom, the two collapsed in bed yet sleep wasn’t coming to them, the adrenaline from work still pumping through them. With all the contentment in the world, the two were on their sides laid face to face, comforted by the small breathing sounds the other was making. Moonlight made its way through the window, bathing the two in a soft light illuminating their bodies. Buck and Eddie explored the new marks that they had gained only hours earlier. Buck ribs now sported in big purple bruise in the shape of a rectangle, Eddie’s hands stroked over it. Slowly, he moved it over to Buck’s heart, so the familiar thump could comfort him and make him believe that he didn’t need to worry about his lover just now. Carefully, Buck did the same, finding the bruise on Eddie’s torso gently caressing it before moving up to Eddie’s heart, so that he could too be comforted by the tell-tale heart that Eddie has. The two beats when intertwined spoke the ancient poetry of lovers, _‘I run to you as the traveller runs towards shade when scorched by the sun’._

Their trance-like state was broken by the sound the intrinsically attuned to, the sound is what made sure that coupling was not witnessed by their son, though there had been a few close calls. As expected, the clacking sounds were followed by Christopher opening the door, during in time they were waiting for Chris to enter the room Buck had buried himself in Eddie’s shoulder. It was Eddie, who acted first because he knew Buck could never say no to the boy, “Mijo, what are you doing up?”, he asked with all the softness in the world.

“I missed you, you were meant to be home hours ago,” Chris told Eddie and Buck with all dismay a child could muster, his face in a scowl that was more funny than the intimidating it was meant to be. The sadness still struck a chord with both of them, even though they all knew the obligations that their job has.

Slowly, Buck pulled himself out of Eddie's shoulder and turned to face Chris. “Superman, we’re sorry but there was a big emergency. We can spend all of Saturday together” he tried to explain to the little boy. 

“I know about the emergency, it was on the news,” Chris said, in his tone, you could hear the childish anger ebbing replaced by a bigger sadness.

“When did you see the news? You know if you want to watch it, there has to be an adult with you” Eddie spoke, pulling himself up so he could lean on his elbows, that was the only way he was able to see over his giant of a boyfriend.

“It came on when Carla and Bisa were talking. I’m sorry, I got upset but you missed bedtime and we got a new book for it and everything” Christopher whispered his speech becoming harder to understand as he grew more tired. If they weren’t as worn-out as they were, they might have noticed the scheming glint in Chris’ eye.

“Hey, no. You’re allowed to be upset when we miss stuff. That’s not selfish.” Buck mumbled the encouragement, while nodded with a jerk.

“Sooo… Can I sleep with you?” Chris asked with a small innocent voice that made him seem younger than what he was, Eddie was well aware that he was being played. He needed his son as much as his son wanted him at the moment. Knowing that he wouldn’t be able to say no if he spoke, Buck waited for Eddie’s decision as he knew that most of the time Eddie wanted to foster as much independence for Chris as possible but he also knew by the fidgeting Eddie had done on the drive home, that his parental anxiety was acting up.

“Fine but only for tonight” Eddie spoke resignation in tone but Buck could tell that Eddie needed it, to have both of them in the room where he could check on them when he needed too. It was nights like these, both of them covered in bruises and the trauma of the day seeping into their bones that Eddie needed to be convinced that his two boys were there and alive. After Shannon, Buck and Chris, the truck and the tsunami , he was so afraid of losing people, the people who mattered most to him that sometimes in the quiet of the middle of the night he needed convincing that he wasn’t in a dream and was going to wake up with them all gone. 

“Really?” Eddie asked when he realised that Chris hadn’t moved, even though he got what he wanted.

“Yeah, I’m tired. Please, Daddy” Chris asked, in the baby tone with puppy dog eyes, he used to get what he wants.

“Ugh, fine” Eddie rolled over and pulled himself up off the bed. Taking his time walking over to Chris, when he finally got he picked up Chris with one hand and Chris’ crutches with the other. Eddie had never been more thankful for his firefighter training then his was in this moment, as Chris was getting to the age where being picked up was still something he wanted occasionally but for most parents, they were unable to do so. While watching Eddie make his way to Chris, Buck moved further to the edge of the bed to make room for Chris. Carefully, Eddie made his way to his side of the bed, rested the crutches on the bedside table before putting Christopher in the middle of the bed. Eddie got in behind him, letting his body settle into the mattress.

Energetically, Christopher began to wriggle around in the bed trying to get comfortable. Finally, he found a position which was comfortable, that was on his back face pressed against Buck’s chest and his gripping his father’s t-shirt, taking up the most space out of them all. Immediately, Chris fell asleep the soft snoring he’s making comforting both of the boy’s dads.

“Chris needs to teach me that trick” Buck mumbled keeping quiet to not wake the little boy, looking into Eddie’s eyes relishing in the warmth coming from Eddie’s hand on his hip.

“I’m pretty sure, you’re the one who taught him it” Eddie whispered back, tightening his grip on the others hip, as though his arm over Christopher and Buck will protect from anything that life could throw at them. They left the air with a small silence, not needing to talk with their voices but just the small touches and little blinks saying more than ever actually could.

It was in this quiet moment, that Buck had the time to reflect when he was younger, well even three years ago he’d never imagined that this type of life was for him. Being loved by someone, having a family was all things he thought he never would have, never wanted to have the fear of being his father at the back of his mind but now lying in this bed surrounded by the two Diazes he couldn’t even fathom of his life being any different. He was theirs as much as they were his. Everyone, at the 118 had changed him giving him the tools to make the key that could unlock the part of himself, that he locked away as a young teenager. When he fell for Eddie, it happened all at once without him even knowing, one day he was his best friend and next the thought being with someone else made his skin crawl. Soon after, he had a never realisation, unconsciously he made and given the key to Eddie. He allowed Eddie to love him wholly and completely, having the ability to hurt him at a moment’s notice and trusting him not too.

He then had another realisation, he wouldn’t have it any other way. His life without Christopher and Eddie Diaz was inconceivable. Then he knew what he needed to do, it was simple. He wanted, no needed to be more than just Eddie’s boyfriend.

But there was one important person, he needed permission off before he could even ask, the question that was now sitting ready on his lips.

As though his body was waiting for him to have that realisation, sleep claimed only seconds later. So Eddie watched as Buck’s eyelids fluttered closed and fell in love with all over again.

How Eddie fell in love with Buck was the same and completely different, they had never been anyone a part of Shannon. He loved her, she got pregnant, they got married, she had the baby, he ran to war, he came back and then she ran. He understood why she left, so when she came back like he knew he needed to try. Both of them failed Christopher and together, they would make it better for him. Then while he was trying to work it with Shannon, he had sex with Buck for first time drunk and sloppy but he felt a connection that brought him to the fact he realised he wouldn’t love Shannon again. But he knew he to try with her for Chris, then he had sex with Buck again, sober and he made the same connection during it, looking into Buck’s eyes and seeing nothing but complete adoration and happiness, that had never happened when he had sex with Shannon, it was scratching an itch. Depending on your point of view in a moment of weakness or strength, he allowed himself to feel. Then it hit all at once and slow as possible, Buck felt like he met another part of him that he didn’t know he was missing, he was in love with Buck and unsure whether his self imposed obligation to Christopher and Shannon was worth it. 

Now, in a bed with moonlight and all its softness illuminating Buck and Christopher, he knows deep within himself he had all he needs. His son and his boyfriend… no Buck was something more, Buck had always been more than just boyfriend. The word boyfriend seems immature, but their love was juvenile, old, timeless everything at once and nothing at all. The little snorts that Christopher was making, reminded him that people in this bed were his. But he needed to make Buck officially his. All his.

But there was one person that he needed the blessing of before he could ask the question that perched on his lips.

Instantly, the exhaustion of the day hit him and sleep gained another member to its company. In the room, the moonlight was the only witness to observe the Storge, Philia and Agápe, no one else but the ethereal moonlight in all her shy brightness needed to be there.

It was only three hours later when Buck woke a mix of anticipation and insomnia playing with him. Knowing, he had zero chance of going back to sleep, he eased himself out of the bed untangling out of the possessive grip from both Chris and Eddie. The insomnia had only increased from being trapped under the truck and was added to by the tsunami. Energised, at the prospect of what the new day could bring, he tiptoed out of the bedroom and made his way to the kitchen. On a mission, the young man made his way around the kitchen with an intense familiarity making lunch for Chris. Softly, he opened the cupboard to find what he was looking for, chickpeas, lemon juice and tahini. Closing the door, Buck looked around the kitchen and finally finding the produce he could at last complete his task.

“I should cut the vegetables, first” Buck mumbled to no one in particular, reasoning with himself. So he set to work, chopping the carrots, cucumbers and peppers into bite-sized sticks that are able to be dipped into the to be made hummus. Being quiet meant that the cutting of the vegetables took longer than they usually would have. Buck was grateful for this as the insomnia had started to win over the anticipation and killing time and having a task to focus on meant that, he didn’t time focus on his tiredness which would lead to anxiety about the question he was going to have ask Chris later today. 

While chopping the vegetables, he had come up with the idea of how to make the food processor make less sound, it involves pillows, a closed cupboard and the t-shirt he was wearing. Carefully, Buck set his plan in motion taking the cushions from the couch, he stuffed them in the cupboard then emptying in the ingredients to the food processor he took his top off and wrapped it around the processor, following the next step in his plan put in the cupboard and shut the door as much as the wire would allow it to be. Once it had started working, he stood by the outlet ready to pull the wire out if it made too much noise, he bounced from one foot to the other waiting to see, more like hear if too much sound was made, it took a minute for him to be satisfied but once he was, he needed to set another job for himself.

Flicking through the catalogue in his mind, Buck eventually settled on laundry. Walking to Christopher’s room he opened the door lightly out of habit because he knew that the little boy wasn’t in his room. Padding around the room softly, so he didn’t wake the guest next door Buck set to work stripping the bed and making it up again, humming _Death of a Bachelor_ under his breath. With sheets bundled in his arms, Buck shuffled over to the laundry basket taking out enough clothes for a full load, he then trekked over to the machine and dumps his armload into it. He then pours some of the baby detergent into the machine, they were still using the baby detergent because both Eddie and Christopher had sensitive skin and the normal one would aggravate Eddie’s eczema, not that Eddie would ever admit it.

Suddenly, it was six in the morning Buck was only made aware of this because of the irritating ring, _rinngg,_ of the alarm that was meant to wake them, signalling them to get Chris ready for school. Before waking the two Buck made Eddie his coffee and Christopher his juice, tip-toeing into the bedroom trying to be silent as possible, he still managed to wake Eddie.

“Morning” Eddie grumbled in his morning voice, locking eye contact with Buck. “Insomnia, again?”

Buck merely nodded, not wanting to expand any further for fear of giving it away or having to talk about the reason for his recurring insomnia.

“You could have woken me” comforted Eddie, starting to sit up while untangling himself from Christopher’s grasp.

“You needed sleep, stop trying to be a martyr” Buck countered, holding out the cup of coffee to Eddie who had finally sat up fully. Eddie returned with a grin, taking the cup and holding his fingers against Buck’s for a lot longer than was necessary, longer than for most couples. A heavy imitate intensity had settled in the atmosphere, creating a place in time in which the two only exist. 

Waking up, Christopher could feel something different in the air with his dad and Buck, _his dads_ , he felt safer and more content than he did with anyone but today that feeling was inconceivably stronger. This spoke to a deeper part of his soul and told him that Buck was always meant to be his parent. 

Christopher broke the two out of their enchantment by asking “can I have my juice now, so I can get ready for school?”

“Yeah, you can Bud but you’re going to have to sit up first.” Buck managed out, taking his eyes aways from Eddie just long enough that Chris knew he was paying attention. Eddie helps Chris to sit up by giving something firm to lean off, slower than usual as his early morning detour out of sleep playing interference. Once sat up, Buck handed the apple juice to Christopher taking care to make sure the straw wasn’t knocked out of the cup.

Eddie still worn out from the strenuous activities from the night before, the coffee didn’t wake him enough to drive off sleep from him, his eyelids started drooping. Buck seeing this and realising the opportunity he was being given, told Eddie “Go back to sleep. Me and Chris have got this, right superman?” 

Christopher just nodded and Buck floated towards his side of the bed, picking up the young boy’s crutches that Eddie left leaning against his bedside table, Buck waited against the wall to see if Christopher needed any help. He managed to get up out of the bed without any need for further assistance, Buck then placed the crutches in Christopher's hands and picked up the empty glass of juice. Once he had a firm grip Christopher led the way out of the room, Buck followed behind every step measured and exact.

In the kitchen, Buck and Christopher began their usual routine. “So big man, What’s for breakfast?” Buck asked Chris now that he was sitting across from, the tone Buck used let him know that if he asked for world, he’d get the solar system. 

“Umm… Mushroom and bacon omelette and more juice, please” Christopher answered with polite conviction.

Buck nodded and turned towards the fridge, it only took a second to find what he needed. He picked up the eggs and bacon, setting them on the counter. When he picked up the mushroom, he set them behind his ears and looked straight at Chris. “Yeah, I think I can manage that” Buck spoke wiggling the fungus behind his ears, earning a joyful giggle from Christopher. Putting them down and starting to chop them, he instructed Christopher “You could do some reading while you're waiting.” 

A couple of minutes later when the omelette had finished cooking and Buck was serving it up, he heard the sounds of Eddie sleeping and he knew that this was his time to strike. Walking over to where Christopher was sitting plate in hand, he sat down across from him and placed the breakfast meal in front of the young child.

“So… Superman, I have a question to ask you” Buck could feel nervousness trickling into each word “But before I ask it, I want you to know that you’re allowed to say no and I won’t be upset.”

“Okay, Bucky. But I can’t answer it, if you haven’t asked.” Christopher told Buck with small hints of sarcasm stepping in, while stabbing the omelette with his fork.

Taking a big deep breath, Buck began to speak but the words seemed to get lodged in his throat. This time he took another big gulp of air, steadying himself and began to speak in a small, tentative voice “I want to ask your dad to marry me. But I want… I need to know that you would be happy about it and not just okay.”

There was a short pause while Christopher continued to eat and Buck could see on his face, that he was working through various emotions in quick succession. The flickers on emotions seemed to settle between two, then the strongest one emerged. With that emotion painted on his face Christopher began to speak, “ I am happy about it. We’ll be a proper family, right. You and dad make me feel safe.”

Buck was relieved the weight on his shoulders lifted, he planned to speak but he could see Christopher biting his lip which always meant that he had something more to say. He gave a slight nod, to encourage the young boy to speak the thought sitting in his mouth.

“Mom and Dad were married, but she. She still left. If you’re going to marry dad, you have to promise not to leave” Christopher whispered out, unsure of his own words.

“I don’t plan on ever leaving. We are already a proper family, it’ll just mean that it’s official.” Buck stated, reaching his hand to hold Christopher’s

Christopher continued on with his food, but started slowing down. His decrease in speed was accompanied by him wanting attention from Buck again. He gained the attention of Buck by calling his name, which caused him to look up from his phone. With regained eye contact Christopher began to talk in slow, measured tone “do you think it’s bad that I’m angry at Mom for leaving ?”

“I don’t think it’s bad, you’re allowed to feel what you’re feeling. Besides you’re not angry at her, you’re angry at a thing that she did. It’s like… like when you were upset yesterday, you weren’t upset at us but upset we didn’t do what we meant to. Okay, it doesn’t make that feeling bad.” Buck spoke in a methodical tone thinking about every word before he said it. “Now, that you’re finished eating, go get dressed.” Buck’s suggestion was accompanied by a click-clack down the hall, from Christopher going to his bedroom.

With being granted the much-needed permission, Buck entered a trance-like state of total happiness. The puzzle pieces of Buck’s life were setting into place, all Eddie had to do was say yes, well he needed to get a ring and have a plan where to do it; he had everything he needed to have, his heart felt full.

“I’m happy for you.” Buck was broken out of his thoughts by Abeula, congratulating him.

“Oh… sorry. I should have asked you” Buck worried, realising that Abuela was the head of Eddie’s family in LA. 

“No, you shouldn’t of. Eddie’s an adult, you got the permission of the only person who you needed to get permission of. You’re there when you need to be that’s enough for me, to be happy for you. That’s what family does, they show up” Abuela reasoned with Buck, her lips pulling into a bright smile. “Besides, you can speak Spanish, that’s better than my other grandchildren’s spouses.” She then turned and retreated into the bathroom.

Left alone he set to work, clearing up the kitchen and packing the rest of Christopher’s lunch. As he was working, the insomnia had been overcome and bone-deep tiredness had set in. Eddie fully dressed, padded into the kitchen and witnessed Buck’s slow effect in his work. He stood for a couple of minutes and admired Buck’s form, tall and muscular. His face a work sleepy happiness. A tired great dane is what Eddie is reminded of, the man was too big to be a labrador in more way than one.

“Go back to bed, I’ll drop Abuela and Chris off,” Eddie told Buck.

“But there’s still so much to do”

“And it will still be waiting for you. We can do it together, anyway”

“Fine” Buck regaled, dropping what he was doing so he can rejoin the land of sleep. Once in the room, he promptly fell on the bed the heavy tiredness overcoming him.

Eddie followed the sounds of Buck’s heavy footsteps down the hall to the bedroom. Knowing how tired he was, Eddie was assured that Buck had fallen immediately asleep. He moved around the house, taking everything that was around the house that Christopher needed for the day and setting it at the front door. Happy with his job, he walked to Christopher’s room and stood in the doorway watching his son get ready, enraptured by the marvel that is his son. 

“You need any help?” Eddie asked, when he saw that Chris was struggling with his socks.

“No, I can do it” Chris asserted, extreing force while finally getting them after some intense huffing and puffing. “I think Buck shrunk them in the wash.”

“Yeah, that does sound like something Buck would do” chuckled Eddie while following out of the room to the hallway closet where the shoes were kept. “Well done” he whispered under his breath, happy with Chris’ fierce independence.

“So what shoes are we wearing today, red sneakers or brown boots?”

“Sneakers they’re more comfortable.” So Eddie picked them up and Chris walked over the couch, letting the crutches fall on the floor after he had sat down. Internally, Eddie cringed at that sound, how many times had he told Chris not to throw them around. Eyeing him a parental glare, Eddie handed the sneakers to his son. That was only returned with a half-hearted shrug and puppy dog eyes, Eddie really wished that Buck hadn’t taught him that look because he couldn’t help but melt. So he just huffed in defeat. During their little exchange, Abuela had roamed into the room, ready for the day. Everyone was ready to leave, but before Eddie could leave he padded over to his bedroom. In the bedroom, he greeted by sight of Buck draped diagonally across the bed, fast asleep which was proven by Buck’s heavy snores. Gently, so he didn’t wake him up Eddie pressed a soft kiss to Buck’s cheek and whispered “goodbye, I love you”, the only reply was a loud intake of breath.

Having said goodbye, the Diazes were now in Eddie’s car dropping off Christopher at school. Eddie was clutching the steering wheel, knuckles white, unsure how to ask Christopher, wondering if it’s too soon after Shannon. Then a resolve hits him, what happened to Shannon is going to hurt and it’s always going to hurt but he and Shannon had come to an amicable agreement just a month before she died, she had known he and Buck were together. She’d want him and Chris to be happy and Buck made them happy.

So he loosened his grip, drawing on his resolve. “Mijo, I’m going to ask you a question and I want you to know you can answer, however you want,” Eddie spoke in a firm tone, the act of driving giving him the ability to push down his fear.

The words that his father had just spoken was giving Christopher deja vu, so he looked at his Abuela in the backseat when she met his eyes, he received a small jerk of her head. Before they could communicate any further, Eddie started to speak again.

“So I want to ask Buck to marry me, would you be okay with that?” Eddie asked, his voice dripping with peaceful need. 

Christopher, too young to understand his father’s feelings deferred to his Bisabuela, due to his driving Eddie missed the soundless communication that they shared. They communicated through furrowed brows, half smirks and bright smiles. The fact that Christopher was taking a long time to reply worried Eddie. A bright mischievous glint settled in both of their eyes and small unperceivable nod confirmed their plans. 

“Yeah, I think it would be great if you and Buck got married” Christoper replied with a bright, toothy smile.

“Thank you, bud” Eddie finished speaking just as pulled into Christopher’s school. The engine rumbled to stop and Eddie got out of the car, leaving Abuela inside. After Christopher was dropped off at school, Eddie continued on with his day getting Abuela home. Impatiently, wanting to get home to Buck as possible, he had run through a few stop signs and parked haphazardly in his drive.

Rushing through his front door, he continued with that speed all through the front of the house to the bedroom. As soon as he could, he settled beside Buck wrapping him in his own arms. The increase in warmth, roused Buck from his slumber with bleary eyes and a grumbly voice. 

“You’re back,” Buck whispered pushing his back harder against Eddie’s chest and bringing his hands to kiss them.

“You’re awake,” Eddie whispered back, kissing the juncture between Buck’s neck and shoulder. “Are you sure you wanna do chores, we could stay in bed all day instead?”

Thought of being all consumed by Eddie, all day was a nice thought and a very enjoyable one. Even the remote possibility of twisted sheets, moaning and heavy breathing was a delight. Turning around to face Eddie, he pressed into his body delighting in the feel of his against his own and buried his head in his chest. In response, Eddie brushed his hands through Buck’s hair, Eddie was taken back he remembered when those actions used to annoy him, Buck making himself smaller it made him feel imposing, did Buck feel the need to make himself smaller because of him. But after getting to know him as a lover, it meant that Buck felt safe and looked after and he also learnt that Buck needed that after his childhood. Buck needed to feel safe in the relationship after as much as he needed Buck to feel safe enough to stay. The big, bright bloom of adoration in chest blossomed even bigger in his chest at the thought of being able to call Buck his husband, the feel of Buck against him gained brilliant conviction that he and Buck were going to last. He could envisage getting old and cranky with Buck and being completely enthralled with the idea, with Shannon that always seemed like a distant figurement of imagination and thinking that was an eternity. To accompany Eddie’s thoughts, Buck was unsure that his life actually began before he met the man he was now pressed against. They didn’t need a hazy day filled of sex to know that they were in love with each other, but they did need food, groceries and new socks (thanks Buck) so both knew that they would be leaving the house today more than the one time that Chris would needed to be picked up.

“You know we can’t, so why tempt me.” Buck pouted, finding his way to Eddie’s Adam’s apple and setting his lips against it. “It’s not fair.” Gaining the reaction he wanted, a breath hitched Eddie's throat, he pulled back and looked up at him.

“That’s not fair. Starting something, you don’t plan to finish” Eddie whispered back, pulling Buck’s face up to meet his, planting a heated kiss that was full of biting lips and soft presses. One of Eddie’s hands was around Buck’s waist and the other was slowly trailing up his chest. The moment was soft and hard, everything that they needed at that moment. 

“Well, it's your fault.” The mocking tone, highly evident in Buck’s voice, it was only met a slight hum and Eddie’s mouth finding its way to his neck. “You’ve domesticated me, it’s disgusting. Instead of sex, I’m thinking about the materials that Christopher history project needs.”

“And now, that’s all I can think about too. Go get dressed, we can leave and then we get back here and have sex” Eddie pushed Buck out of bed as he instructed him.

“Telling me what to do, doesn’t usually get you off. Well… not this early in the day” a bright toothy smile accompanying his chatter, as he stumbled out of bed to the closet. As he started to undress, he realised that Eddie was watching him, “are you just going to sit there watch me?”

“I may as well enjoy the view if I’m not having sex” Eddie answered by poking his tongue out at Buck. He continued to watch undress, marvelling at the sharp lines, taut muscles and small curves. The skin perfectly unblemished and tattoos elegantly painted on, Buck was a work of art. The younger man had now begun to dress, his watch over him still continuing. As he began to put the red T-shirt on, he felt compelled to speak up “the green one it brings out your eyes.” 

“Fine... I’m wearing it ‘cause it looks nice, not because you told me too.” Buck countered back while pulling the t-shirt over his body. A soft buzz followed Buck’s voice, his phone getting a message notification. With his phone closer to Eddie than himself, he asked the man “Could you see what they want?”

“Yeah” Eddie paused, his eyes finding it hard to leave their view on Buck. “It’s Maddie, she wants to do brunch with us and Chim.” he continued, his tone making it very clear that the very thought of that was unappealing. “Looks like our day, just got busier”

“We could cancel.” Buck offered, doing up his fly.

“No we can’t, we’ve already cancelled two times last week.”

“But...sex…”

“So you want me to tell your sister, we can’t come because we’re having sex instead”

“No, I want you to tell her that we’ve got errands to do and then we’re having sex instead”

“That was a rhetorical question, do you know what those are?”

“Sooo….No sex today, that works for me,” Buck spoke up now dressed as he was leaving the room.

“Hey, baby it was a joke c’mon, you know I love you” Eddie playfully pleaded, as he too began to leave the room.

“Oh...so now all I’m good for is sex.”

“That’s... not what I meant.”

“I know, I just like seeing you flustered”

“I like seeing you flustered as well,” he replied, pulling Buck down into a big kiss, his tongue finding its way into his mouth making stops behind his ears and along his neck. Buck moaned at the contact, his neck and chest gaining a reddish hue.

Eddie continued his tender assault down to the soft skin of his neck, earning even more pleasure-filled moans from Buck. This act was reciprocated by Buck and his own gentle journey beneath Eddie’s shirt.

“We’re not having sex, remember” Buck giggled, his hands now tangled in Eddie’s belt with his own his hips meeting Eddie’s. The remark earned a big intake of air, as Eddie was breathing in frustration, so their entanglement was broken apart but remained attached by their hands.

The idea of marriage was occupying both their minds, filling them both with contentment and excitement. A deep desire burned within them with a need for contact with each other, the need wasn’t sexual in nature but was born from the delight in which followed in the decision of listening to the heart. The inability to maintain their hands to themselves was born from the need to show the other what they had decided without giving away the secret.

“Later”

“Later”

They both agreed, finally strolling their way out of the house hand in hand. Before they stepped out of the house, Eddie turned and asked Buck a question with a soft tone “have you had, you’re meds today?” 

“No” Buck answered as he shook his head

“Do you want to?” Eddie asked again, his voice laced with warmth. Buck didn’t speak this time but answered by shaking. “Okay I’ll drive then”

Once in the car, Eddie was sat in the driver's seat and Buck in the passengers, hands still clasped together. Before starting the car, Eddie pressed Buck’s hand against his lips, gaining a grin from his lover. The loud rumble of the car signalled the start of his journey. Chimney and Maddie were already at the bistro, a little place off the beaten path with windows that let a lot of sunlight in that had a little garden with a pond filled with koi fish. The two had already found a table outside under the shade of an oak tree, aimlessly chatting while waiting for the other couple to arrive. It was a day to sit outside, hot enough that sitting outside was enjoyable but not hot enough to be unbearable. Hearing the trickles of laughter, they were aware that Buck and Eddie had arrived before they had even seen them. 

“Buck, Eddie. Hurry up and get to the table, I’m hungry” Chim shouted, annoyed at the two dallying.

“Chim, man calm down. You’ll get to eat today” Eddie jested as they rounded the corner, Maddie and Chim coming into his view.

Now sat down at the wooden table, Buck’s head was now rested in the crook of Eddie’s shoulder and his left hand clasped with Eddie’s left. Tactility was a major part of their relationship, it is usually boisterous and teasing, but today there was an increased tenderness in it as though the consumption of affection was increasing their appetite for each other. Today, it was like their cup was slipping over, it’s hard to remain distanced when overfilled with love, they needed to touch each other as much as they need to breathe, if not more. The other couple at the table was mildly surprised at the increase of softness of affection, the mildness in the surprise was due to the fact that younger couples had been slowly increasing this type of their affections with each other in public without themselves realising it.

An air of comforting familiarity settled between the two couples, an atmosphere where they could be completely them without any pretence. Under the light shade of the overhanging tree, the four people perused over the menus in front of them, it was Buck and Eddie who had chosen first, pancakes and eggs benedict. Chim, almost too hungry to make a decision, settled on a everything breakfast wrap. Slowly, Maddie fingered her way through the menu stopping every few seconds then moving on, to the much hungered annoyance of Chim’s. 

As soon as she had set down the menu, Chim huffed out a single breath. “Finally. What do you want?” Untangling himself from the chair and the table, squeezing Maddie's hand as he stepped away.

“The parfait, without blueberries,” Maddie answered, turning her face to smile at him.

Eddie too was parting from the table to order, with slightly more grace than Chimney. Buck’s head followed him in every movement, not wanting him to be out of sight for a second. Eddie’s free hand had migrated to the side of Buck’s face,“Pancakes, right baby ?” Absorbed in their own world, the two men failed to notice, Chimney mouthed ‘baby?’ at his girlfriend. He received a withering look which told him not question it and that she would get the answers they both desired. Buck merely nodded, pressing his face further into the hand that Eddie had tenderly placed on the side of his face relishing in the skin to skin contact. With all the adoration in the world, Buck looked up at Eddie with big puppy eyes which lead to Eddie pressing a soft kiss against the expanse of Buck’s forehead. When Eddie’s hand was still being held, gripped tightly mirroring his own unwillingness, his tone changed to reassurance when he spoke “I’ll only be a couple of minutes”

“I know, but I'll still miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too.”

Slowly, with each finger having its own time to ponder on the disconnection, Buck and Eddie’s hands were completely and uncomfortably their own. The lack of their skin against the other was stifling, the prospect of marriage was propelling a need to be in contact with each other at all times. The fact the other was just as involved in the increase in affection only satisfied them in the knowledge that had made the right decision. Pulled out of the haze, they were met with Chimney’s impatience in the form of tapping his foot, so Eddie took that as a challenge and uses his height to his advantage setting a pace using his bigger stride that Chim will struggle to keep up with.

“Eddie, c’mon man. This isn’t fair!” Chim whined, half jogging half speed walking trying to catch up with the man up a small hill. Eddie dragged himself to a stop, tapping his foot and chuckling. “I get it, you don’t need to use it against me.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Eddie replied in a haughty, teasing voice. 

While the _companions_ of the Buckley siblings made their inside of the restaurant, so they could order, they were left to talk. 

“So…?” Maddie stretched out the word, leaving the question out in the air.

“So…” Buck just repeated back, carefully avoiding the question.

“Do you want me Chim to leave, so you and Eddie can do each other on the table?”

“The only reason, we’re not having sex right now is ‘cause Eddie said we can’t cancel on you again. So… if you feel inclined.”

“Buckkkk!” Maddie wined, “Didn’t need to know that.”

“You asked, you don’t get to be freaked out about the answer.” Buck told Maddie, in know-it- all tone.

Maddie conceded pulling her eyebrows down from her forehead, her starting to change into sibling teasing. “Really, why are you two so loved up at the minute?” 

“We’re not anymore ‘loved up’ than usual” Buck mimicked, his elbows leaning on the table facing Maddie. Seeing Maddie unamused face, looking at him from under her eyelids and her lips turned inwards. Buck knew he couldn’t tell Maddie because she would tell Chim and those two together wouldn’t be able this a secret. “Eddie, is just so great, ya know. He’s just so… So good to me, and like ugh, pretty and has a nice butt. He cares and loves me and he doesn’t need to tell me, I feel it. It’s always there, like my skin it's another part of me. No one has made me feel like that before. No one.” He finished, smiling back at his sister, complete, irrevocable and utter peaceful love etched into every pore of his face.

While the Buckley’s continued to talk, Eddie and Chim made their way inside the restaurant. Now in step with each other, Chim kept stealing glances out of the side of his eyes at the younger man, it wasn’t that Eddie hadn’t noticed Chim’s indelicate looks but he knew if he did acknowledge the eyes sweeping over him, the question would start and Chim couldn’t keep a secret to save his life. He was going to propose to Buck and it had to be special for him, for his sötnos, for his baby it had to be perfect. Finally, after a few more seconds of walking, they were inside so he relented. 

“Yes, Chim?” he invited.

“You guys must be having some really good sex.” Chim teased in his statement, eyebrows matching his tone. 

“What are you talking about?”, Eddie question back trying to avoid getting the realm of the seriousness of his relationship. The two shuffled forward in the line, giving them slightly more space for Chim to gesture while Eddie kept his hands in his jean pockets.

“Oh, c’mon, you know what I’m talking about.” The older man garbled with gestures appearing at each syllable, adding to the evident displeasure. “You’re all over each other, even more than usual.” he continued, the teasing tone staring veer into light frustration.

“We’re in a relationship Chim, people usually show affection to their significant others”

Chimney did not miss the promotion in Buck’s status, sure he had been Eddie significant other for a while now rather than just his boyfriend or lover but neither of the two had referenced each other as such til today. He quickly hid his surprise at Eddie words, choreographing his face into passive acknowledgement as the two always were a bit testy when it came to the progress of their relationship. As the two in the relationship, Buck and Eddie both knew where their defensiveness came from, the two started having sex when Eddie was still having regular sex with Shannon. It’s not like Eddie and Shannon were together, but they weren’t not together either and still legally married the lines were blurred, but she had given them her blessing and happy for them together. To everyone else but Abeula, Buck and Eddie had been together nine months but they had just had their year anniversary two months ago. 

“Yeah, they do show affection and you guys do too. But this is…” instead of talking, Chim gestured more wildly unable to find the right words because it wasn’t different but _something else._ “So, I repeat good sex because if it making you two act like that I need some tips.”

Confident in the topic of the conversation wouldn’t give anything away, the tension he didn’t know he was holding melted away. “Any tips I can give wouldn’t be very useful, ‘cause me and Buck are both, ya’know men…. But I could give Maddie but I don’t really want too, cause she’s Buck’s sister.” Eddie said dryly, smirking at Chim a beat passed before both of them laughed.

“Now that I’m thinking on it, you’re right. It would be weird” Chimney agreed after their short bout of laughter ended. “Seriously, though man I’m, we’re happy for the both of you. You both deserve to be happy and that’s what you two do for each other. Maddie is happy that someone else loves him as much as she does. After...everything they deserve it.”

“Yeah, they do but I can’t take all the credit, Buck is pretty easy to love. Have you seen him, ‘cause he’s like woah? And he’s so good with Christopher, most people would find me having a kid hard but not him, he just took it in his stride. He loves so easily, it makes me feel like a teenager frankly it’s pathetic but I can’t bring myself to care.” Eddie gushed, finally taking his hands out of his pockets to rub his face and neck brushing the hickey Buck had given in the cleaning closet of the station, being reminded of their impromptu liaison, which had happen because the two were playing a game with each other, teasing until one of them broke; if you asked Eddie he would say, Buck if you asked Buck he would say, Eddie, if you asked anyone else at the station they would say that the couple needed to learn the meaning of subtle and Bobby would tell you he hadn’t seen anything even though he was the one who caught them in the closet.

By the time Eddie had gotten to the end of the speech, they ended up at the front of the line at the counter where they could order. So Chim reeled of his and Maddie’s order with an added pitcher of mimosas. It was then Eddie’s turn to order, he added a treat for Buck to the order. With their job done the two men made their way back to their other halves. During the short walk they continued their conversation about their Buckley siblings significant others. 

“Have you had _that meal_?” Chimney asked disgust dripping from each letter. 

“Yes, it’s… I have PTSD from it” Eddie answered just the thought of it making him gag. Swiftly changing topic Eddie spoke again shudders still making their way through his body, “So, do you think we’ll have to testify about fire yesterday?” 

“It might just be Bobby or one of you two ‘cause you caught in the dust and saw the fire safety failures.” Chim answered back, his many, many, many years of experience being a source of important knowledge.

Deep in conversation with Maddie, Buck felt Eddie arms around his waist before he noticed him, the strong arms tightened around him and he melted into them. Eddie buries his face in the crook of Buck’s neck, Buck turns and rests his head on top of Eddie’s head “ I miss you too, Cariño.” Buck whispered, clinginess breaking into his tone, Eddie pressed a small kiss on his neck in lieu of talking back earning a soft baritone hum from the back of Buck’s throat, that soft sound only encouraged Eddie who grazed his teeth along the spot he just kissed, Buck quiet hum from earlier got ever-so-slightly louder. The two were being watched by the couple on the other side of the table, Maddie and Chimney continued to exchange veiled communication -raised eyebrows, pointed looks and half gestures- about the heightened intensity of Buck and Eddie’s affection. Reluctantly, after a minute or two of groping and fondling Buck pulled Eddie to sit down; as Eddie lowered himself beside Buck he placed his arm around the younger man's shoulders. Like sun to a sunflower, Buck was drawn to Eddie’s touch and when the arm was placed around melted into the heated skin- now that everyone was resettled, the conversation started flowing and both Buck and Eddie skirted around any topics that was even slightly connected to proposal. 

“...So me and Chim just sneak out of their house.” Maddie laughed, relaying her dinner party story from earlier in the month.

“Then the next day, they called me and asked what happened. So I just made up, that I got called in for an emergency.” Chim added his sentence being broken by outburst of uncontained laughter.

As the older couple finished their stories, the waitress with their food in her hands walked over to the table. “I’ve got Eggs Benedict and pancakes”, with their food tantalisingly in front of them, Eddie gestured to him and Buck, so plates were placed in front of them. Then the remaining plates were placed in front of Chimney and Maddie. Only seconds later a waiter appeared and placed two glasses beside each person's plate, one for the mimosas and one for the jug of ice water. Buck began to pour the drinks, only water for Eddie as he was the one driving today and a flute of mimosa for himself. Slowly, taking his time his body reluctant to untangle himself with his lover. 

Before Buck could begin to eat, Eddie caught his attention. “I got a treat for you.” Eddie spoke, puffing out his chest pleased with himself that knowing that it would make Buck happy. He pierced the extra bacon he ordered on the fork and brought it to Buck’s lips, Buck had formed an idea of eating the meat teasingly but hunger got the better of him so he ate it quickly and without looking Eddie placed the fork beside his plate. The two held eye-contact for a couple more seconds, while Maddie and Chimney made faces that went completely unseen by them. Hunger making itself known, made sure Buck and Eddie actually started eating their food, Maddie and Chim could not be more grateful. 

As soon as Chim’s teeth breached the breakfast wrap, he made guttural noises hearing them Buck scrunched up his nose and asked “Do you have to make those noises?, it’s disgusting.” 

“You’re the one asking me that, Buck from _Eddie and Buck_?” Chimney scoffed

“Yeah and…?” Buck spoke back, his tone laced with confusion.

“I’m not doing this. Yeah, sure I’ll stop.” Chimney conceded, not having the energy to deal with Buck. 

After the light ribbing, the four returned to their food the sounds of eating broken by short bouts of small talk. As they were getting the last morsels of food on their plate Maddie caught the eye of one the waiter and signalled for their jugs to be refilled, as they had order bottomless mimosa as she was nowhere near intoxicated enough to cope with her little brother being so touchy-feely with his boyfriend. After they all had finished eating and the conversation began flowing more the topics starting at work schedules to the weekly family dinner at Bobby and Athena’s house (which Chim and Maddie were seriously questioning going to if the other couple were still going to be so loved up ) to Christopher’s history of firefighting project and his ever-increasing pride about his family lead to Buck placing his head on Eddie’s shoulder while Eddie gushed about how, before he wrapped his arm around Buck’s waist, he ran his hand through his hair. The added attention caused Buck to further nuzzle his face into the older man’s neck, at a snail’s pace Buck pulled his face out of Eddie, with his head remaining on Eddie's shoulder he joined the conversation again. But Maddie and Chimney were ready for the two to become completely and utterly absorbed with each as what ever was making them act with this intensity, made sure they couldn’t go ten minutes without them being the only two people in existence. 

Walking back to the car feeling the soft grass turn into harsh gravel underfoot and the small pleasant breeze ruffling all of their hair, the two sets of couples were intertwined and idly chatted to one another.

“What are you guys doing on Sunday?” Maddie enquired to Buck Sunday being only day free and wanting some Buckley bonding time so she could get the bottom of why Buck and Eddie have increased their public displays of affection with one another. 

“Us, Hen and Karen are taking the boys to the kid’s science museum, they’ve got a new explosions exhibit and a planetarium. Chris is obsessed with constellations at the minute.” Buck answered excitedly and Maddie he too was happy to be going. 

“I remember when you were too.” Maddie told Buck wistfully. “Every night when it was warm enough, we used to lay down in the garden and point them out.” She continued on now telling Eddie and Chim.

“Really?” Eddie asked, not really needing an answer as Buck was the one who knew facts when Chris asked for them, he had just assumed that Buck was searching them up in his spare time as that was a very Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley thing to do.

“Yeah, it all came from Maddie telling me Greek legends and myths as bedtime stories.” Buck answered back matter of factly.

“You told Greek myths as bedtime stories… the ones about murder, pillaging and incest” Chim questioned, Eddie narrowed his eyes clearly confused and disapproving.

“First of all I resent the judging, I was a teenager who didn’t know better.” Maddie told the two, when she was finished she poked her tongue out at them. 

It was then Eddie turned his head to face Buck, “You’re not allowed to tell Chris about scary or inappropriate ones, you can tell Hercules or something like that.”

“It’s Herakles” Buck and Maddie spoke in unison.

“What?” Eddie asked, slightly disturbed by the unified annoyed conviction.

“We’re talking about Greek myths but Hercules is the Roman version,” Buck answered as though anyone who didn’t know this was an idiot, he continued on with this tone “I wouldn’t tell Christopher even about ‘cause Hera is not great in it.”

When they reached their cars, they said their farewells, hugged goodbye and got in their cars. Maddie and Chim got in the car quickly as Chim had the forethought to unlock the car on the walk up whereas Eddie being entranced by Buck it hadn’t even been a fleeting thought in his mind. So like a newborn puppy he fumbled around in his pocket for the keys, then when the keys were in his hands it continued so opened the car doors at a slow pace. Once they were both in the car, assured that they were safe, Maddie and Chimney drove off. Carefully, Eddie reversed out of his spot, placing an arm around the back of Buck’s seat and looking over his shoulder. Having Eddie stretched over him, Buck couldn’t help but regard his feature against the brightness of the sun, his dark hair, his pretty nose and beautiful face it belonged to. Something about Eddie’s driving sung to Buck, but this position really got to him. Buck rationalised that it was something about him being capable that made the act of Eddie driving so hot, he turned his head full towards Eddie’s body so he could soak in the picturesque view of the man silhouetted against the sun.

Eddie is fully aware of what him driving does to Buck, so he takes his time moving out of the spot but he does move faster than he would like to as they needed to get the groceries and Christopher materials for his project. Now that was fully reversed out of the parking spot, he had half of his attention to Buck and the other half on the road as he pulled out from the parking lot.

“Which store do you wanna go to, the small one or the big one?” Eddie asked, letting Buck make the decisions. 

“The small one it’s closer to the school and Chris likes the fruit better from there too,” Buck stated, giving the ability to move with direction. “And we need to get more lube, that shop we get the one you like from is only two blocks away”

“We should go there first, ‘cause if we do that, then won’t have to rush around the groceries,” Eddie told Buck, as though his point was coming from practicality and not lust. 

“Obviously, we can’t be rushing around the grocery store, even though by the time we get there they’ll still be a few hours till we pick Chris up.” Buck teased back. “Don’t forget it’s pizza night tonight before you complain about the mess on the table later.”

“I will complain about the mess later, but sure you’ll find a way to make it up to me,” Eddie told Buck wanting to bring the conversation back to teasing as work had been busy this week and they had hardly any time together during in twenty-four hours and their forty-eight hours off had been mostly sleeping and parenting.

“Well you know, I’m very good at _sucking..._ up,” Buck told Eddie fluttering his eyelashes as he turned his head towards Eddie hoping to get caught in the corner of his eye.

Eddie didn’t even need to see out of the corner of his eyes to know what Buck was doing but he could and that just made unquench lust from this morning build up even more. It brought him back to their first kiss, the lead up starting with staring through his fluttering eyelashes, the distance between getting closer by second and his own chest heaving with deep breaths of need, having so much time to think about it, but his being pleasantly blank. All he could in reply was a jerky nod, before he found a resolve.

“You’re not allowed to distract the driver.” 

“How am I distracting you, I just told you that I would find a way to make up for the mess the pizza night brings.”

“Yeah, right!”

It was only an hour later than when they should have been at the grocery store, which meant after the thirty-minute journey they had only spent thirty minutes in _The Watering Hole_. So now that they were back to the daily grind of homemaking and nothing else they could wish for; they walked through the automatic doors with Eddie pushing the shopping cart with Buck in step with him, the sides of their hips brushing ever so slightly. As they rounded the corner into the store, Buck walked forward faster as Eddie watched him to the produce aisle and chose a pineapple, a bunch of bananas, avocados, bell peppers, mushrooms and red onions he the turned on the balls of his feet and unceremoniously dumped the armful in the cart that Eddie had now slumped over. Towards the end of the aisle, oranges were in the display box he picked up a few and threw the first one in the cart, Buck was going to continue throwing them in but when received raised eyebrow from his boyfriend, he huffed and walked over and put them in the cart with exaggerated gentleness. The only thing Eddie could do in reply was a stifled giggle, using his tallness to their advantage Buck leaned over and pressed a sweet short kiss on Eddie’s plump lips. 

Like a ship on its maiden voyage, Buck returned to Eddie’s side as they made their way further into the store, stopping off at the baking aisle. The aisle was relatively busy, so as they turned into it their walking formation changed from in tandem to a single file line with Buck in front and Eddie happily following along while folded over the cart. After bobbing and weaving through the crowd, Buck finally reached the flour that he needed he then looked over his shoulder to check where Eddie was and ever faithfully he was coming up just behind him. Waiting until the cart and Eddie were just next to him, Buck turned on the balls of his feet and placed the bag of flour in the cart, he continued on with the list of ingredients he needed from this section of the store. The two were shooting lovelorn glances at each other as though the small distance was the of Alaska and Hawaii, they were growing in annoyance at the overflowing aisle as it seemed like people were just hanging out in it instead of shopping with it’s increasing difficulty Buck decided that he would come back here later. So when Buck caught another longing look from Eddie, he averted his eyes to the left sending the message and Eddie got it immediately which could be told in the way he stood up a bit straighter after receiving the message. 

It was these moments of soundless communication that always made Buck’s heart flutter, as someone, _Eddie_ had made an effort to understand him. Eddie didn’t know that Shannon had pulled him aside and told him that loving Eddie was wonderful but also hard and Buck could understand why she had said that because he seen the parts of Eddie that could be hard to love but for him they weren’t hard just bits of Eddie that needed more of Buck and he always had more to give for Eddie and Christopher. For Eddie the reason his heart skipped a beat, that Buck took the time to understand him back like it was the easiest thing in the world, he knew it wasn’t at times he was distant or angry or depressed and Buck was ever patient giving him space when he needed and being there even when didn’t want him. He couldn’t fathom not ever loving Buck, it was never an effort, breathing was harder than loving Buck.

Waiting at the end of the aisle that fed into the main walkway of the store, Buck played with his fingers for very few moments. When Eddie and the quickly filling cart reached Buck’s stronghold, the Latino snaked one of his hands towards his lover before being led to the next aisle. The only thing Buck could do was smile, flutter his eyelashes and lick his lips in return, so squeezed his hand in return, a promise that his teasing will come back to bite him, probably actually including real biting. Another corner was turned and the two found themselves in the deserted frozen section, using this to his full advantage Eddie pressed Buck between him and the cart. The younger man was left waiting for the kiss, as Eddie stared into his bright eyes daring him to initiate and well Buck was never one back down from dare because that’s how he dislocated his shoulder two months ago. The kiss was passion filled, starting with a soft nibble and moving on to Buck’s arms encircled around Eddie’s neck and Eddie’s arms wrapped around Buck’s waist, the shopping cart all but forgotten about. But the kiss was cut short when Buck pulled away, his eyes caught on something in the freezers.

“Cariño, there’s Chicken nuggets in the shape of stars Chris would love them” Buck sped through the words, excitement pushing on the accelerator, his fingers brushing against the nape of Eddie’s neck at a much slower pace than the rest of what his body was currently running at.

Eddie pulled away from the crook in Buck when he had deposited himself when the kiss had ended too soon. “Just, Chris?” Eddie asked, Buck taking issue with his knowing tone.

“I guess… I might… think they cool too” Buck reluctantly admitted outwardly miffed with Eddie’s smile but inwards Buck couldn’t help but find it funny too and the tightened grip around his neck told Eddie that too.

“You don’t need permission from me to get food, Bobo” Eddie told Buck as confusion set in.

“I know that, but I do need you to let me go so I can go get it, _Bobo.”_ Buck joked back, placing his head on Eddie’s shoulders.

“I don’t want to let you go.” Eddie whispered resuming his place at Buck neck.

“I don’t want to let go either, but chicken nuggets. I’ll only be like twenty seconds and I’ll hold your hand in the car.”

“Fine, but you gotta pay the tax.”

“ Well you can’t say no to the taxman. So what’s the payment?” 

“The usual.”

Like a wave hitting the shore, Buck pressed another kiss to Eddie lips and his fingers from the nape of Eddie’s neck to the sweet spot behind his ears, that act made Eddie shudder. Satisfied with his work Buck pulled away and peered down at Eddie, slowly like dripping honey Eddie pulled away. As quick as possible, Buck walked to the freezer two doors down while Eddie impatiently waited wanting him back in his grasp. It was barely twenty seconds, when Buck returned from his expedition, violently putting the frozen packets in their new home. He then returned making it so that they both returned to their rightful positions in each other’s arms. And begun making out like teenagers in the now not-so-deserted aisle, finding that ever rare stillness of peace in the arms of one another.

Their continuous exchange, was now being witnessed by a young teenager who couldn’t help but stare. Something about them was so captivating, their happiness and contentment evident on their faces when they stopped kissing and rested their foreheads against the other. Their positive emotion so clearly etched on their face and their unashamed pride at themselves, comforted this teenager making him believe that would be just as happy with his boyfriend when they were real adults. 

So when his boyfriend loudly found him “Babe, there you are, I’ve been looking for you.” Their attention snapped round to them, startled by the undetected intrusions, and a series of smiles were exchanged, starting with Buck and the first teenager that was in the aisle Micah, and continuing on with Eddie and Johann. Even though it was a few seconds, those acts did what they needed to and the teenaged couple made their way to the checkout.

After the interlude in the shopping, the two realised that they couldn’t get distracted by each other anymore if they wanted to pick Chris up on time. So they returned to the baking aisle and picked up the needed ingredients in the now much empty aisle, this was done as fast as possible as was the rest of the shopping as they whipped round the store. As usual, when they got the checkout, it was Eddie who waited with the groceries while Buck, who gets easily bored, bopped in and out of waiting, disappearing off to something more engaging than just waiting in the small walkway until you reached the till. When that was all done, Eddie stored the cart away and both of them picked up two bags in one hand, hurrying to the trunk of the car with Eddie using his free hand to pop it open. It was only seconds later when the two were sat in the car, Eddie in the driver and Buck in the front passengers, assured that they were both belted in Eddie started the car, Buck watching Eddie’s hands was now aware that he has one free hand and reached out for it and it’s well known feel of comfort, the calluses and grooves were a weight blanket ridding him of any existing anxiety in that moment. They began their journey to pick up Christopher.

It was just turning three thirty when the car pulled into the parking lot of the school, they had got there with ten minutes to spare. Having time meant that they could unbuckle themselves from their seats. Brightly, the sun beamed in through the windshield, bathing the young couple in its golden glow. The natural light, only increased the longing, which Buck tried satiate them by resting his head on Eddie’s firm muscular shoulder relishing in the quickly appearing gooseflesh skin. Eddie replied in like by holding Buck’s hand and running his thumb over the others knuckles. The only thing Buck could do was bury himself deeper into that well-known crook and the only thing Eddie could do was hold Buck’s hand tighter, slow the running of his fingers and rest his head on top of Buck’s. They were both grateful that the other was so responsive to the others increase in affection, as the realisation of the need to marry meant that attention to and from the other was complete and absolute, they were comforted by the others receptiveness as to them it assured them that they were ready for him to propose. And the haze was over as though it passed in a millisecond and now it was three forty and it was time for them to reunite their family, so at a casual pace they got out of the car and made their way into Christopher’s classes pick up area.

As soon as they came into view of the glass doors of Christopher’s classroom, the rushing clacks of crutches could be heard bounding down the classroom. As soon as he reached the parental strongholds in his life, a familiar routine began, the two men resting their faces on either side of the child’s face. Letting the seconds rush over them, grounding them in that moment and delighting in them being a family. Christopher the only one in that current moment, knowing that they planned to propose to each other was absorbed in his parents, they made sure he was safe and content. Comforted by Buck never planning on leaving, Chris was just as happy as the day when Buck and Dad told him they were together except this high was sure to last a lifetime. All three starting laughing, a deep belly laugh that exuded joy and slowly with Eddie brushing Chris‘ hair back his fingers carding through it in the same way one would wade through treacle, they separated and the teacher caught Eddie’s eyes. So Eddie waltzes over to them, leaving Christopher and Buck to their own devices.

“Baba, come and see my painting, they said that they were going to put it on the display in the hallway” Christopher excitedly screeched in all one breath. As usual, with excitement Christopher’s trained control of his limbs loosened and his head tipping back in enjoyment, Buck decided it was easier to pick him up and be directed to the painting. The infectiousness of excitement caught Buck as he bounded into the classroom as per the instructions, the intensity of the feeling was causing Buck’s smile to grow even wider and thrumming of adrenaline pouring itself into every limb. Weaving in and out of the hordes of people in the busy room, they finally made it to the line where the picture was hanging up. “We had to make a picture then make a story about them. I chose the Perseus constellation, I forgot to tell you that they are putting my story on display too.” 

The volume of Buck’s voice was untamed because of the excitement he and Christopher shared. “Roo, I’m proud of you, the painting is done so well. Dad is going to be so impressed when he sees it too. We’re always impressed with you anyway.” As Buck continued on he realised how loud his voice was and made an effort to retain himself, it burnt like fire bubbling under his skin. But bending down to Christopher’s level and looking him in the eye, doused it like water, reminding that his attention only needed to be on Chris for the minute,“Can you show me more of your work while dad is talking to your teacher, Roo Roo.” So the two shuffled around the room, stopping at the places that Christopher’s work was on display, while Eddie was busy with the teacher.

When Eddie got closer to the teacher his walk changed from a waltz to a march; back straight, shoulders tight. They stood in the corner of the room the place that would give them the most privacy. The teacher one of the two assigned this class, roaming over Eddie’s body in a way if Buck saw he wouldn’t be the least bit happy, noticed how high his shoulders were. So she took on a professional but sweet tone, “It is nothing to worry about, Mr Diaz” continuing on with her line of enquiry, “I was wondering if Christopher had taken his meds today, as he’s been excitable today.” The corners of Eddie’s mouth tightened as she went on with her talking, Ms. Monroe seeing this changed her tone from professional to a softer reassuring tone “not badly behaved, just having trouble focusing and remaining on task with things he didn’t like. That’s why I asked about his meds.” At that the tension in Eddie, softer to a smaller hue his shoulder relaxing with each passing seconds.

“Christopher got some exciting news today, it was probably that. I’m sure that he had his Vyvanse, he has it every morning with his breakfast.” Eddie told the teacher his tone murky with both happiness and defensiveness, with a small but tight smile on his lips.

“I expect that I’ll be hearing about it soon enough. Thanks for letting me know, I’ll talk to Mr. Wright but we might pair him with the teaching assistant Mx. Kaiwi for the next couple of school days, just so he can get some work done in class and not have to take it home, as I know that your time with him can be limited.”

“That’ll... Thanks for thinking of us and telling me.” All Eddie could do was a polite nod and a accompanying smile, looking around the room for his boys when he set his eyes on them. He started talking again, filling the short slience with his voice “I’ll try and make sure Chris is calmer when I drop him off that usually helps him get into the groove of the day. Thank you again for thinking of us.” Eddie said, a real smile bright and effortless worked it’s on his visage, with the conversation now ended, he moved with all the grace of a wolf returning to his mate and cubs to Christopher and Buck who were now in the playground engrossed in a game that somehow involved play fighting, counting and loudness. While to some the unbridled noise could be annoying to some, the production of noise due to excitement was comfort both of the two work so hard to control themselves most of day, that them letting loose was enough comfort that he never needed. 

“DAD...What took you so long, we got bored?” Christopher shouted, now from Buck’s shoulders in the throes of childish exasperation.

“You found a way to entertain yourselves, didn’t you? Ay, I blame this rudeness of Buck.”

“That’s not me, I’m delightful. You on the other hand…” Buck smiled back at Eddie holding Christopher’s crutches at him, without any reluctance he took them and let the two continue in wholly in their playful manner.

“Bebé, you are delightful but you’re also…” before Eddie could finish his sentence, he was interrupted by Christopher, who found another thing to feed his excitement.

“It’s…” Christopher played a drumroll on Buck’s head, which Buck slightly tilted his head up at joining in “Pizza night, yay!” 

“Yeah, it is. We went to the store and got everything we needed for your history project and your favourite toppings. We’ll start your project today until it's time to make the pizza, then will work on it a little bit everyday.” Eddie said, with a commanding sprinkled with flecks of endearment coupled with furrowed eyebrows and a soft smile, one that tells the world he had found that rare contentment that everyone strides to find. Buck matched him with the same soft smile but his was wider as though he was a portrait painted by an artist, the subject and objective of total, utter euphoria. Not needing any influence but it’s effect increasing the joy on Christopher’s face as he stayed on Buck’s shoulders with his hands clamped around his swaying legs. Those looks of glee remained on their faces as they strode towards the car.

In one fluid movement Buck removed Christopher from his shoulders and put him in the back seat of the car. Eddie leaned against the car, looking over it, observing Buck and Chris with their exchanging smiles. Quickly, the two got in the front resuming the positions they had spent the day in, before setting off Eddie craned his head around to check that Christopher had his seatbelt on confirming that it was, he turned his head towards Buck checking for the same thing, finally he put his on. The journey home, passing the lush green trees that lined the streets that they drove passed towards home, only took a few minutes well twenty but a short time for Eddie, the others in the car not so much for them it was an eternity. 

...

As the night started to wind down after the excitement of the project and pizza, the young family found themselves, snuggled up on the couch watching John Mulaney and The Sack Lunch Bunch. Eddie was half lying down with his back against the pillow and the armrest of the sofa, a swiftly numbing arm thrown around Buck with his hand gently brushing his hips, Buck on his side pressed into Eddie’s burrowing himself deeper into the man with his right leg resting over the man’s crotch, Christopher was neatly placed on top of Eddie with his own legs laying on top of Buck’s, his head on side one ear listening to his father heartbeat and the other to the tv. Every so often Eddie would alternate between putting his fingers through their hair, his right hand reserved for Buck and left for Christopher and light, barely-there kisses to their foreheads, every time Buck felt it he would look up, smile and flutter his eyelashes against Eddie’s cheek, Chris barely noticed it too engrossed in Mr. Music’s breakdown and tiredness from the excitement of the day and waking up to sneak in with his Dad and Baba overcoming him. 

Eddie continued with his attentions to family, at a slower pace as he caught up with his thoughts. The feeling of rightness spreading within him, as he had them in his arms this was the place he needed to be and had everything he needed. That feeling spread even wider reaching the tips of fingers and toes, as he considered the ways he could propose, it had to be special. His pondering was interrupted by intruding thought that he hadn’t told Christopher, not to tell Buck but then he was stated that if he was to tell him that that was just as special as anything he could come with on his own. Wandering out of his pondering, he found that the child on top of him was fast asleep, the steady intake of breath inflating the boy’s chest pressing against his own. 

He brought a hand over the back of his head, resting it on Chris’ sleeping form. With his feet he kicked up the blanket that rested by them and pulled it up to cover him and Chris with his right hand he held up one corner, turning his head to face Buck and whispering “get in” Buck borrowed himself even in to Eddie like a barnacle on the hull of a ship, filling the tiny empty space between them until it was non-existent, all three of them huddled on the couch enclosed by each other providing safety and warmth. 

With his head still turned to Buck, Eddie found himself caught in a kiss quick, polite and passionate which he returned in the same vein. When they broke apart as quickly as they joined, Eddie asked the question quietly so not the wake the sleeping child, Buck knew was coming and Eddie already knew too “Call the midwife, we’ve nearly finished season four?”

Buck nodded, not feeling the need to speak. Eddie found the remote and started switching over to the agreed on show, not liking the lack of Eddie around him, Buck pulled the arm back down to rest against his hip but this time Buck rested his own hand on top of Eddie’s planning on not letting him go anytime soon. With his actions being disrupted by Buck, it took Eddie an extraordinarily long time to get to the menu, he was again interrupted by the butterfly kisses on his cheek. In return, he made a soft grumble almost silent coming from high in his throat so he didn’t wake Christopher up and returned to the menu of netflix. 

Buck was at peace, everything was quiet and neatly put away in its place. Right now he was content in just being, surrounded by Eddie and Christopher, enveloped by them and him enveloping, he felt something he hadn’t felt for anyone but Maddie a need to protect, a need to protect his family. He felt that everyone in the fire family was _family_ but they wanted to protect him, but was with Eddie and Christopher they weren’t just the family he found and helped make for himself, their are his family that he had found, made and was always waiting for him. Watching the show, with his head resting on Eddie’s shoulder in between the times when press small pecks and butterfly kisses, it occurred to him that he had never told Christopher not to tell Eddie and he worried for a second, well several, just a second he would tell anyone but then realised that if he did tell Eddie that it would be testament of how he was always thinking about his family. 

The night carried slowly and seamlessly, one minute trickling into the other. With the sun now set, the only light that filled the absence in the room was the flickering flame from the candle, adding peace to the world of love and safety Buck and Eddie had created through the hard work of devotion, a bubble of existence that only included their family and the bonds they have being tested and strengthing by them, the peace of just them was absolute perfection. 

Eddie just as Buck was enjoying lying there, with his lover and Christopher, knowing and feeling that they were safe. As Christopher burrowed deeper into his chest, he’s reminded of his son as a baby, when it just them in the small hours while Shannon slept, in the living room and Christopher lying on him as he was drinking his bottle. It was those times when he was younger that he felt like he could actually do it, be a parent to a child like Christopher, a parent to Christopher, free of any doubt that existed during day influenced by other people and their perception of him and Shannon as young parents. His in-laws had made it especially clear that they didn’t think he was good enough for their daughter, Shannon had her own issues with them, yet it was his fault that they didn’t see each other enough. Now with Christopher and Shannon needing extra help than she would have done if his son had been born able-bodied, they made sure that he didn’t feel worthy enough of his family, through their passive aggressive comments and microaggressions that he couldn’t understand stand anymore was of Hispanic blood too. So when a deployment came up he took it, so he could finally do something worthy of his family. He feels worthy now, Buck makes sure of that.

He’s reminded by the dying flame and the end song of the fourth episode of call the midwife, that it was getting late and Christopher needed to be in an actual bed. So he paused the tv and shifted towards the edge of the sofa each limb stalling with movement, Buck’s grip on his hand tightening and Christopher whining at the disturbance to his sleep. All Eddie could was roll his eyes, Buck saw that and flicked his fingers against his thighs and Eddie dug his toenails into Buck’s leg in return. For a moment, Eddie let Buck settle against him again this time his head against Buck’s neck but the hardness of the sofa now bore into his back in his new position.

“Baby, I need to put him in bed, he can’t sleep like this all night.”

“But… But… Just a little bit longer.”

“If I give in now, we’ll sleep here all night won’t we?”

“Yeah…”

“Then in the morning, you’ll complain that your back hurts.”

“Okay, fine. You’re right.”

“Besides, I think that we promised something earlier. I’ve been waiting all day and so have you.”

“Let’s go, then.”

With Buck in compliance, he moved Christopher over to him so he could get up with ease. Stood up he waited for Buck to put Christopher in his arms, watching as Buck carefully moved towards him, keeping Christopher close to his chest. When he was within reach, Eddie bent down and scooped Christopher up taking care to try and not wake him up. But it didn’t work he could feel him stirring, the breathing change told him that, Buck had too followed him up from the couch and was opposite him, soft eyes examining the scene in front of him. Placing one foot in front of the other, Eddie walked down the hallway his hands full with Chris and Buck trailing behind as they got closer to the door Buck step in front of them and opened the door. Continuing into the room in front of them, he pulled back the covers of the bed. Eddie strolled into the room, his job now easier for Buck’s help as he got to the bed he transferred Chris’ body from resting on his torso and supported by his arms, to just in his arms to lower his son into bed.

As he moved from his father’s arms to his bed, Christopher finally woke from his sleep. “Daddy…?” Chris asked whiny and bleary-eyed, his arms tightly linked around Eddie’s neck.

“I’m here, superman.” Eddie answered, stroking Christopher's hair back and pressing his cheek against his son’s “Go back to sleep.”

“Baba?” He asked for Buck in the same needy tone, causing Buck to move from the chest of drawers to the bed.

“I’m here too, Roo Roo,” Buck told him, getting closer to his face so that he could be seen as Chris wasn’t wearing his glasses, he cupped the side of his face with his hands.

“Wanna stay with you.” Christopher told his fathers in a way that if you weren’t them you wouldn’t understand as his tiredness got the better of him.

“No. You did that last night and you’ve had time with us since you got home. You can get in with us in the morning.” Eddie said to his authoritative and caring all at the same time.

“But…” Christopher said his tiredness still making him whiny and needy, his arms around his father’s neck tightening and pushing into Buck’s hand.

“We’ll stay until you fall asleep.” Buck added, starting to sit on the bed all too aware of Diaz stubbornness, finding a solution that is the best of both worlds. Christopher moved his head onto Buck’s lap, with that Buck started stroking his hair at a slow pace trying to lull Christopher back to sleep. Eddie sat down too, on the other of Christopher taking hold of his hand, tracing shapes on the back of it and watching Buck and Christopher interact this way filled him with happiness, there not many people that care for their step-child like that with love and affection that would have come from being Baba from the start of his young life. Inspired and in awe, Eddie reached over and brought his unoccupied hand to Buck’s feeling the light stubble against his skin, touching his face making sure Buck was real and not a perfect figment of his imagination. Buck’s hand stilled when Eddie reached for his face wondering what the man was doing, but when the hand settled against his cheek he carried on stroking Chris’ hair while relishing in Eddie touch pressing himself further into it like a cat. The soft snores coming from Christopher alerted the two of them, that the child was now asleep, so Buck began to gently untangle himself from Christopher making the boy didn’t wake up again.

As soon they left in a warm silence and the door was lighty shut behind them, they had hands all over each other. They were halfway down the hall before Eddie pushed Buck against the wall, his body flush against the other his hands making their way up his shirt dragging his nails against his nipples and biting his neck intending to leave his mark all over him. Buck used his hands to pull Eddie hips even further into his, feeling the rapidly hardening member against his own, Buck rounded his hips feeling the denim against his member desperately seeking some kind of relief. When Eddie felt Buck grind into him, he placed a leg between his and carried on his assault on Buck’s neck slowly moving up to his lips. The kiss was needy, wanton, hungry as though all that had been leading up to their coupling had reached its boiling point.

They broke apart for a second to catch their breath, during that interlude Buck took the initiative and led Eddie by the hand into their bedroom kicking the door shut behind him. Eddie pushed Buck against the door and braced his arms, each one on either side of him, taking in his body seeing the light flush of blush on his skin, the adam’s apple bob and him melting under his stare, with his fluttering eyelash. Eddie can see the need on his face, it’s the same look that he’s pretty sure is on his own face, he let one beat pass then two. Not being able any longer Buck whined, pulling at the hem of Eddie’s shirt, the owner of the shirt just arched an eyebrow, unamused by the sarcastic response he pushed his leg between the other’s making sure to be slow and teasing but provide enough friction that would make him react. Eddie stifled the moan hiding it in the back of his throat, that happened at the contact Buck had provided but his lover didn’t need sound to know that he had made his lover face pleasure the tensing of his muscles gave the gratification he needed. 

Eddie following after Buck, started sucking at the spot behind Buck’s ear and ghosting his hands along his skin on his hips teasing but never completing the journey, he continued grinding into Buck’s leg. Buck now achingly hard, pressed himself into Eddie’s hip trying to let him know that he was doing was working, Eddie snaked his hand down to the bugle cupping it but not touching it any further letting Buck stew and relish in it. Buck pulled the one hand now braced on the side of him, starting with his thumb Buck placed it in his mouth sucking slowly and hallowing his cheeks out. Eddie stopped grinding for a moment and watched Buck suck on his fingers moving from one to the other and pulling his lover’s hips flush against his own allowing him to grind into him, Buck now being watched decided to put on a show; sucking even more slowly and grazing his teeth against them, fluttering his eyelashes, producing more saliva, making short breathy moans, trying and succeeding in riling him up. Fed up with waiting Eddie pulled his little finger out of Buck’s mouth, moved his hands down to Buck’s pants fiddling with the button and zipper eager to get the main event. Buck followed his hands wrapped around the belt that belonged to Eddie, they moved towards the bed as one losing clothes along the way. They fell onto the bed, feeling it creak under the strain of two tall and muscular built men, with Buck legs wrapped around Eddie and hands clasped together, the two were set to devour each throughout the night, finally giving in to the desire that had followed them all day.

In the blink of an eye, their forty-eight hours were over. They were walking into the station bleary-eyed, dazed and completely satisfied, it was painted across their faces with their big knowing smiles. They were the first in the locker room to get changed, not because they were early but that most of the firehouse was still scarred from the early days of Buck and Eddie, changing into their uniform pulled them out of daze just leaving them with their feelings, nervousness trying break through to the surface of both of them battling with the fear of that their plans would be revealed. But they were both completely absorbed with each other, the world shut out from the rest of them. So now changed out of their casual wear, they made their way into the kitchen where Bobby would give out the chores for the day after he had fed them.

Being the first ones ready meant that they were able to find seats on the couch, Bobby, who was preparing a hearty breakfast of burritos- chopping vegetables behind the counter, saw them sit together which wasn’t unusual, but Buck collapsing into Eddie and his head turning into his shoulder like he was returning home after a long time away was. There was something even more unusual, Eddie didn’t shy away from it like he would usually do at work even when they were alone instead he rested his head on top of Buck’s, brought fingers to dance across his neck and whisper, his nose glancing the top of the ear, into Buck’s ear clearly taking part in a conversation that Bobby could only see part of. Bobby was not surprised at the affection but he was at the tender intimacy of it, he like most of station had been subjected to the trying to be covert foreplay of the two but this was something else, witnessing it made him feel as though he was intruding on a private moment that wasn’t meant to be observed. Even as boots pounded up the stairs the couple didn’t pull away, Eddie just pulled Buck more into him tangling their limbs together so they only took up one seat on the couch, a small giggle emanating from the small corner of his mouth that Bobby could see he was amused by something Buck had said.

As they stepped on to the floor they were provided with the sight of Buck and Eddie engrossed in each other. Reminded of brunch that had only had hours ago, Chim rolled his eyes and trudged over to the sole armchair while Hen raised an eyebrow and snorted. At the noise Eddie whipped his head up, his fingers still making a dance across Buck’s neck, now free of the weight Buck followed Eddie’s lead turning to face Hen but not moving his head away from its rightful place. Both of them had the same expression, furrowed eyebrows and ever so slightly hardened eyes at the interruption, they let a moment pass but only a moment. Hen was still behind the sofa, when Eddie and Buck returned to their previous position with Buck now wrapping his arms around Eddie’s waist and him allowing it, as though they were proving a point. Hen sat down beside them, raising her eyebrows and narrowing her eyes at Bobby and Chimney.

The looks between the three, quickly morphed into only Hen and Bobby with Chimney already having been subject to Eddie and Buck’s constant evolving display of love. As Eddie continued to whisper Buck’s ear while playing with his neck, Hen could see Buck chest shake with laughter, a lightness emanating from them that lifted the air around them. Pulling one his arms from the embrace, Buck reached out to hold Eddie’s hand, the muscles in both their melting like a hot knife in butter. Eddie stopped the glancing of his fingers on Buck’s neck and just held his head.

Hen and Bobby shared another look, gaining a derisive snort from Chimney who was still reading his book. “They were like this at brunch, a couple days ago. Get used to it...it won’t stop”

“What’s up with them?” Hen asked her curiosity now peaked, as she saw Buck’s breath slow out of the corner of Hen’s eye when she broke eye contact with Bobby and landing it on Chim. “It’s weird... for those two.”

Chimney and Hen shared a suspicious look with one another that Bobby half caught, while occupied with the preparing the breakfast. A few seconds passed before Chim started making loud obnoxious kissing noises, Hen joined in with a teasing tone in a high pitched baby voice “Ooo, Eddie you’re the best and I write poetry about you while you sleep. No Buck your the best, listen to the song I wrote for you.”

Eddie pulled up his head, bit his tongue and rolled up his eyes. “You’re behaving like kids . Honestly!” Eddie stated but this statement was slightly ineffective as Buck just poked his tongue out at them and Chimney doing the same back.

Bobby intervened as he did the finishing touches on the breakfast, “Behave! Leave them alone! Call up the others, it's done and the rest of you sit at the table.” Chimney, Hen, Eddie and Buck all turned to look at him; a few raised eyebrows, challenging looks from offended adults and just knowing resignation from Buck. “If you’re going to act like children, I’ll treat you like it” Bobby told them in his dad voice, that Buck knew too well. “How are you all idiots? Can’t believe you have kids of your own '' Bobby stage whispered for effect. Doing as they were told, Hen strolled down the stairs to the locker, Buck let Eddie lead him to the table where the couple sat down holding hands and Chim had tiptoed over the counter, leaning over it to pick at the food while Bobby had his back turned. Before he knew it, Chim’s hand had been whacked by a wooden spoon he snuck back like a naughty child and devoid of any food he sat at the table opposite the couple, playing fortnite on his phone. The minute he looked up from his phone, the sight before he made him rolled his eyes Buck was tracing Eddie’s collar bone while they were looking into each other’s eyes longingly, as Bobby started set down the plates at the table Chim looked impatiently waiting for him to do something. So Bobby flicked a dish rag against their heads “Not at the dinner table”, reluctantly but without resistance they obliged. Then they heard a stampede rain against the steps, everyone eager to eat the first meal of day and with Bobby’s cooking that only added to their energy. Bobby, Hen, Chimney, Eddie and Buck sat bunched up together on one side of the table but everyone who was sat at the table was joined in the community spirit of family. But everyone that was close family of Buck and Eddie broke bread under a new atmosphere, aware that something had changed but swept under the current of trust and understanding that they would be told if and when they were wanted to know but the buzz seemed to influence everyone a small burn of excitement was in everyone. Like any family, while the ate jokes, laughter and conversation littered the air an act of bonding that only sort to strengthen them.

The shift trudged on, only a few calls outs for Hen and Chim. It is what could be called a slow day, but no one would because they didn’t want to jinx it. So the chores that Bobby had set for everyone that would usually be done over the shift, were done within four hours, even Chim and Hen jobs were just transporting stable people to hospital. With the chores done, everyone took their turns working out and Bobby stationed himself in the kitchen baking to fill the time. Uncomfortably, Buck was laying on the too small sofa while Hen sat on the other, the two setting up the playstation so they could play overcooked. Chim and Eddie had disappeared twenty minutes ago with the promise that they would be back in thirty, all anyone was aware that they were still in the house. 

As the game opened Chim and Eddie returned to the seating area, all three of the occupied but as Chim sat down next to Hen and Eddie pulling Buck’s head up, so it could rest on his lap. Hen saw the sheepish looks the two were shooting each other, “What. Did. You. Do?” she asked, eyeing them and enicating every word, while Buck gave them the controllers to join in on the game, which let Hen see the skin under the sleeve of Chim’s arm.

Too quickly, they answered “uh..nothing”. The tone was too casual, that Bobby looked up from his baked alaska and Buck pushed his head backwards from the screen to look up at Eddie.

“Then why does Chim have a bruise on his arm?” Hen asked with her arms crossed and head tilted to the side.

“Uh...its cause…” Eddie stumbled on his words and Chim was playing on his phone.

“If you were cheating on me with Chim, we’re going to have problems.” Buck teased, smiling up at Eddie.

Eddie looked back down at Buck with a reassuring teasing in his tone, “Eheww… That’s so not what happened.”

“Hey, now. You’d be lucky to hook up with me.” Chimney said back eyes squinted with offence.

“You’re just not my type” Eddie shrugged off, while he and the others picked their characters.

“And what is your ‘ _type’_?” Chim asked with air quotes. “If you say Buck I’m going to vomit” he continued in the tone of annoyance. 

Eddie was going to answer but Bobby cleared his throat loudly and deliberately, so they all turned focus to the game. The playing of the game quickly devolved into screaming and shouting at each other when they lost a match but they got even louder when they rarely actually won a match. But this level they had replayed at least five times, Hen was starting no she was annoyed. 

“If you didn’t get stressed and just stuck to your job chopping with Buck, we would have won.” She lectured Chim.

“Um… Eddie messed up his job too. Why aren't you telling him off?” Chim countered back.

“Fine!” Hen threw her hands up exasperated. “Buck and Eddie can work together but you can’t burn the food. I’m going to a drink, you want anything?”

A look of dumbfoundedness crossed Eddie's face, before he whispered under his breath. “Vatten”

Buck who was equally confused “uh, babe no hear speaks Swedish.” 

Eddie didn’t dignify Buck idiocy with a response, and continued to rack his brain for the right word, before knotting his eyebrows and whispering “auga”

Buck made a sound a recognition, before smiling up at Eddie familiar with the tendency of polyglots to forget words in different languages. He still didn’t translate for the rest of them because Eddie’s face while trying to find the right word delightfully endearing.

“Water!” Eddie exclaimed, too happy at finding the right word which earned a quick huff of laughter from everyone.

“Juice”

“Hot Chocolate”

Buck earned a look of indignation when asked for something that took steps to prepare, Hen added a huff so he knew that wasn’t going to happen. 

Bobby stepped in before, Hen’s annoyance resurfaced, which would have ended in him sending to time out which was cleverly disguised as inventory tasks that he didn’t need done. Hen, don’t worry I’ll make it.” She rolled her eyes, Buck had a way of getting what he wanted, especially out of Bobby and Eddie. So Bobby set to work, heating the milk up on the stove.

While Hen was up and getting everyone’s orders, Chimney looked over at Buck and Eddie (who were busy staring into each other’s eyes while Eddie brushed his fingers through Buck’s short hair) questionly and let a few seconds pass before asking “Why did you make that joke, anyway” while pulling his eyebrows down his face.

“ ‘cause you have a bruise” Buck answered notchantly, with a grin that was too toothy. “Eddie likes to leave…”

“No. Nope. No.” Bobby said, loudly making sure to cover up the sound, while pouring the drink into the mug. “We already know too much about your sex life,” he declared, now handing the hot mug to Hen. As he pulled himself to sit up, Buck’s t-shirt rode up the bruises that were littered his whole torso, and were exposed at his hips. Eddie saw that the others had seen them and he couldn’t help but smirk at them, extremely pleased with himself. The controllers lay forgotten on the table, as conversation was exchanged during in that time; Bobby had finished his soufflés and his biroches, Chim, Hen and Eddie were debating they favourite food, Buck just sipped his drink his attention bouncing between Bobby and the others with his settled hand on Eddie’s thigh. As Buck took his last sip of the decadent hot chocolate the bell rung, signalling that they actually could do their jobs today. On instinct, they all rushed down to the truck, putting their protective outfits on before stepping into the truck. They jumped into the engine and strapped themselves in, Bobby’s radio poured out information, letting them know they were attending a multi person car crash. As they blew out of the station, small concerned looks passed Eddie’s way but only for a moment, time healing the grief so their worry lessened and Buck squeezed Eddie’s hand letting him know that he was there.

The scene was carnage a car had driven into the middle of a minivan and that van had veered into oncoming traffic, turning over and taking three cars with it. Unsure where to start, they all looked to Bobby to get their orders. The first thing he did was call for more units, then he told them to triage the injured and treat the worst. So the two teams consisting of Buck and Eddie and Chim and Hen started making their rounds to the vehicles.

The accident was over after a couple hours of hard work, the jaws of life had to be more than once, a baby and his mother had been pinned in their car that the front of it had been trapped under the minivan. The mother had nearly died but the two paramedics had got her stabilised enough to send her off to hospital, they then moved on to the people in the minivan. They all continued moving from car to car until their job here was finished. 

When they had finished their objectives, somberly they bundled into the fire truck leaving the scene for the clean up crew and the police. They were tried, all of them not physically but emotionally. It stunk, the smell of sweat hung heavy in the air of the truck. Without the sirens, they let the silence brew that all needed, a time to reflect. In the midday L.A traffic, the slow moving of the engine lulled Buck to sleep, him getting tired more easily after what happened to his leg, his head finding its usual pillow on Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie reached up and used his hand to support Buck’s head, so it didn’t move around with the directions of the truck. The accident that they had been called to had reminded Eddie, reminded him too much of that fear that he had when he saw Shannon in her own accident and Buck trapped under the truck- and the terrifying grief and haze of loss that accompanied the death of Shannon. Touching him, having his skin against his own was needed to feel Buck, to know he is here and he is real.

When the fire engine pulled into the station, Eddie woke Buck up slowly and gently while most of the crew made their way to the showers to wash the product of their hard work off them. Hen and Chim followed the majority of the family to the showers, Bobby went to his office and called Athena to follow up the people involved in the accident. Buck woke with the loving tenderness that Eddie intended him too, he nuzzled into his neck before pulling away and looking up at his lover. Seeing that Buck was still heavy with tiredness, Eddie used his hand, placing it on the middle of his back to guide Buck out of the truck.

With all the delicateness in the world, Eddie continued guiding to the bunk room where they would be alone. He needed to be alone with him, a bubble that would exist of just them for a short time, this need only convinced him that the plan to propose to Buck was right, he wouldn’t feel this paralyzing fear if it wasn’t. Entering the bunk room, Eddie didn’t bother turning on the light and gently shut the door behind him, trying to keep Buck from waking up completely. Buck let himself be manoeuvered into the bed first with his back against the wall, knowing that this was necessary. Eddie got into the small bed afterwards turning his back toward the closed door, he needed to be the closest to the door so he could protect,and taking Buck up in his arms, pressing his lips against his forehead and brushing his fingers through his hair trying to send him back to sleep. They stayed intertwined in a bubble where time didn’t exist, Eddie just taking in Buck- feeling him, smelling him and being comforted by the very existence of him.

In the tight hug, Buck moved between sleep and awakeness for Eddie and because of him, trying to provide comfort that he so needed, while giving into the gifting touches that was being given to him. Slowly, with his legs crossed over Eddie’s hips, he pressed small kisses along his neck and collarbone that was only interrupted by the stillness of sleep as he dozed off and woke up again. Buck was trying to calm the fear Eddie had buried deep in him, as his own fear of being left alone again increased with it

Knowing Buck the way he did, the man had to feel as though it was okay and Eddie would be alright without his wakeful input. As hard as it was Eddie swallow the bubble in his throat and verbalised the reassurance that they both wanted “Baby, I’m not going to leave, I promise. All you need to do for me is say the same,” Eddie whispered into his ear, stilling and tightening his grip on Buck’s hair.

“I don’t ever want to leave. I promise, I’m going to stay forever…” The younger man whispered back his voice heavy with sleep and croaky, moving his head to Eddie’s chest, so he could hear the beat of the music that Eddie’s body made for him and Christopher. He yawned then continued on “We’re going to be together for so long, you’ll be sick of me…” Buck, realising what he had just said, stopped himself before he could say anything further, fearing that he had already given away too much away- tension starting to make its foundation in shoulders.

That fear only convinced them even more that marrying the other was a beautifully right and ever fated idea, because they trusted the other not leave and they could never find it in themselves to doubt that.

  
  


Eddie could feel the added heaviness in Buck’s shoulders, knowing that it was unsureness but thinking it was because his lover was worried he was further along in the relationship than he was. He rubbed his lower back in circles and nuzzled into hair, before whispering “don’t think I could ever get sick of you” in return Buck pressed himself more into Eddie. 

Grumbly, Buck continued to stir, making huffs every so often before he could wake completely, Eddie stepped up the soothing gestures; stroking his hair and murmuring sweet nothings. Quickly, his ministrations worked, Buck was teetering on edge between awareness and sleep but he could tell that he was fighting it, “as long I’m here with you, I don’t need anything else right now. Go to sleep.” Eddie still spoke in whisper but his voice held comfort, authority and permission and like magic Buck fell asleep. Eddie stayed wrapped around Buck, blissfully awake feeling the steady breaths against him, taking his fill of Buck’s body and presence. Every so often, he would cup his face, drinking in everything Buck is.

Elsewhere in the station, Bobby had finished his call with Athena and had his own shower. Hen and Chim had finished their own showers and were now sitting in front of the tv half rewatching the L word, Eddie and Buck had now been in the bunk room for a better part of half an hour which was starting to worry the two. Leisurely, at the pace of a stroll Bobby returned to the throne room of the firehouse but seeing the concern on his friends and subordinates, he, changed his demounear from carefree to matching their concern, sat down opposite them.

He got himself comfortable before asking a question, “What’s wrong?,” in his caring captain tone, holding eye contact with both of them.

Chim was the one who spoke and answered “it’s… just that …. they’ve been in there for a bit.” He took a swallow breath in before speaking again, concern and hesitation worming its way into his voice, “ That was a hard call for Eddie, should we go check on them?” Hen nodded along, agreeing that they were both asking this question.

“No. I think Eddie just needs Buck on his own for a moment. I wouldn’t worry, Buck gets tired more easily than most of us, so they are probably sleeping. But they’ll be ready for a call.” Bobby placated, reassuring both of them and sympathising with Eddie. He also had an inclinking, that something big was happening or was going to happen with Buck and Eddie, thinking it was a mix of both paternal intuition and the obviousness of it but they haven’t mentioned it for a reason yet and he was going to respect that. Looking back to conversation he had overheard, he was pretty sure that Buck and Eddie had got together earlier than when they announced it to everyone, so he assumed that maybe the increased affection was the result of an anniversary of some sort. He was also surprised that the others were so oblivious to why they were affectionate with each other had changed but then again they didn’t know what he did and they loved differently to Buck and Eddie, his first wife loved like them maybe that why he found them easier to understand than the others.

It was only ten minutes later, when the young couple emerged from the bunk room. Buck’s cat nap lifted the heaviness of tiredness of his face, his features bubbling with more vigour than earlier. Eddie’s face had melted some of that tight-lipped fear away, that being replaced with contentment which could be seen in his eyes shining with brightness. As they walked out of the bunk room, Buck and Eddie bumped shoulders and held that position a few seconds longer than other people usually would. Now fully awake, Buck could feel the uncomfortable texture of the dirty uniform and dried sweat on his skin, eager to get that feel off of him Buck walked with a stronger purpose a few paces in front of Eddie. Bobby saw his chance, even though he was sure that Eddie was okay he still had to check and Eddie was more likely to open to someone when they were talking one on one. The man took two steps at a time so he could reach the other before they turned the corner into the shower room, Bobby knew better then to follow the two into the shower room. It didn’t take much to catch up with Eddie as he was walking at the pace of a stroll, before he spoke Bobby schooled his features into something that was between empathetic, fatherly, knowing and understanding with also careful consideration of his tone.

“Are you okay?” Bobby asked, with his eyes softened at Eddie.

Eddie nodded gently answering with cautiousness, “yeah, it’s just…”

“A bad day” Bobby tilted his head and finished for him.

Before answering Eddie looked over at Buck who was waiting by the door to the bathroom and smiled that was dopey, full of love and worship. “A good one” Eddie countered as he turned his head back to Bobby. The smile he had changed into something that was both bitter and ecstatic, which Bobby could share and returned for just a second. They let that moment sink into the air around them before Bobby nodded and squeezed Eddie’s shoulder before going back upstairs.

Eddie caught up with Buck, who was now in the room trying to find clean towels. Eddie took charge in turning the one shower on, and stepped out to allow it to heat up. Eddie was peering over his shoulder at Buck who was now bent over in the cupboard where the towels and uniform were kept. When Buck finally found everything they needed, he made an aha sound while turning on his heels catching Eddie staring at him at that he gave him a lust-filled grin that was paired eyes full of love. As steam entered the room, clothes made their way off of the bodies they belonged to, it wasn’t long before Eddie pulled Buck into the shower.

With Buck and his naked body kissing the length of his neck, he could feel his body responding to the ministrations. “We can’t get caught again,” he told Buck, as he cupped his growing member.

Buck mumbled into Eddie’s neck “so...be quiet.” At that comment, Eddie tightened his grip, which Buck had a small moan at. Eddie pulled back and raised an eyebrow at him and Buck shrugged before kissing him again.

**Author's Note:**

> Which title do you prefer? To be perfectly honest, I don't know when the next chapter is going up but this took me 4 months to write but it is part of series and I do have at least five other fics idea/plot outlines for the series, this was also meant to be a one-shot. It was inspired by a video, I saw on twitter but I can't tell the video because it will spoil the next chapter but if you've seen it you know where I'm going with it.
> 
> my other fic 'a sweating unexploded mine...', I know it's been a bit but I do have the next five chapters planned I just don't how to put it into words.
> 
> and for all the five people who are also barisi shippers, I've got a crossover planned and it's angst, whump, hurt and comfort. It looks like it's gonna be around fifty chapters with about 5,000 words each but that just a guess. As a warning, Buck and Barba do sleep together more than once but they do not come close to a romantic relationship, I did not intend for that to happen but during my planning, the characters took over and they wanted to fuck. 
> 
> Obligatory Tumblr plug: gaiamax
> 
> I have created a playlist but I think I should post it when the fic is complete
> 
> also if you know the poem that the chapter title comes from: aye *with finger guns*
> 
> Toss comment to your writer, oh valley of plenty


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